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Photoplasty Photoplasty. I was a perfectly healthy freak. They just do it right there in the office. As you can imagine, my classmates weren't terribly nice to me. For several months, I squished myself into my underwear in much the same way you try to close an overfilled trunk, and I didn't even have the option to sit on it. It protects you from infection and keeps scarring to a minimum, but it's like masking tape -- it rubs off so easily, especially when you're flailing around like a dork. I had no idea what size I was for a long time, because most stores don't stock sizes past DD. Nobody has awesome long-term decision-making skills when they're I remember the weirdest thing was that I could, like, reach in front of myself now. Add me to the weekly newsletter. So, right now some young dude is out there thinking this is the story of a young girl who won life's genetic lottery. By seventh grade, I started begging my parents to let me stay home from school more and more often and, thankfully, they understood. Click on over to our best of Cracked subreddit. I agree to the Terms of Service.

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Description: On the bright side, that scar tissue is totally dead. The two things that everyone heavily warned me about -- that I would likely have very noticeable scars and trouble breastfeeding in the future -- were the furthest thing from my traumatized preteen mind. I also got a bonus prize in the form of a very dark lump of scar tissue about the size of a cent piece on the bottom of each breast from the removal of the infected tissue. What I still didn't expect, however, was the shape. Burns, and I give it 20 years before I'm typing with my nose, but hopefully by then I'll be able to afford regular massages. My neck, shoulders, and upper back are in pretty much constant pain. I hear there are plenty of photos on the Internet if you wanna see some examples. Come at me with that shit. Do you have any idea how long it takes me to get up from this position. But I doubt it, because
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